Luna's Journey
by Shiika777
Summary: Second MLP fanfic :). Had this idea to write Luna's adjustment after she became Princess Luna again. She's my favorite character :). But, as always, let me know how you feel about this fanfic. Don't know how long this one's gonna be yet; this is the only chapter I have written so far. Hope you enjoy. Jesus loves you 3
1. Chapter 1

I was returning home after Twilight Sparkle took away my dark side. Celestia and I were still in the chariot, almost near Canterlot. She looked so regal, sitting there in the sunshine. I looked down at the ring of roses around my neck that some of the Pegasi had given me. Yes, it was a gesture of acceptance and welcome, but it was also a reminder of what I was. I still can't believe that I became _that_…that dark, evil Princess of the Night. It still frightens me. I never knew jealousy could make a pony so monstrous-

"Is everything alright, Luna?" Celestia asked, interrupting my thoughts.

"Huh? O…yes, sister. I'm fine."

"No you're not. There's something on your mind. What is it?"

"It's nothing." I quickly turned my head away from her. I hated that she was being so nice to me. I don't know why. I just did. I didn't deserve her forgiveness.

"Luna…" Celestia said softly; she lowered her head slightly in concern.

"It's nothing, Celestia!" I said angrily. I shouldn't have raised my voice; I know. But I didn't want her talking to me. I just wanted to run away and be alone. I didn't deserve any of this.

I fought back the tears of shame for who, what, I used to be. Celestia raised her head. "Alright, little sister. I won't ask anymore questions."

I felt horrible, then. I didn't mean to lash out like that. "I'm sorry, Celestia. It's just…I can't…" tears were starting to choke my words. I then felt something slowly wrap around me. It was Celestia's wing. She pulled me in close and held me tightly. I hated this even more. It was too kind, too loving, too sentimental. I couldn't take it. I couldn't break free from her grip, but I did turn my head away. I didn't want her to see me cry. I didn't want anyone to see me cry.

We finally arrived at the palace a few minutes later. I felt us descend, then bump slightly as we landed. Celestia released her grip on me. I jumped out of the chariot as soon as she did. I know those weren't my best manners, but I didn't care then. I just wanted to be alone.

"Luna?" I heard Celestia's voice as I was starting to trot away. I forced the tears back in and turned around. She was standing, mane and tail flowing, face full of concern. "You've been acting strangely ever since we left Ponyville." She walked towards me, then stopped when she was by my side. I hung my head and turned it away from her. "What's going on, Luna?" She asked sadly.

I couldn't take it anymore. She wasn't going to stop asking what was wrong. She was too good of a sister to stop. I finally let it out.

"I don't deserve this."

"Deserve what?"

"This, Celestia. The ponies' acceptance. Their forgiveness…your forgiveness…I was a monster, sister. I don't deserve this. Any of it!"

"Luna, please. You're not a dark princess anymore."

"And how do you know that? I became dark because of jealousy in my heart. Because I felt that I had to outshine you, or permanently dim your light, whichever was more effective…it came from inside me, Celestia, which means that it might still be there. That monster is still inside. What if she comes out again? I can't be trusted. It'd be better if you sent me back to the moon. That's where I belong…" The tears came freely after that.

"Luna…" she said gently as she wrapped her wing around me again. I hated that.

"Please," I whispered. "I just want to be left alone…"

She took her wing off of me. "Alright. I'll have one of the guards escort you to your room."

"No, please. Let me walk alone."

She sighed. "Alright, Luna. It's down the hall, going towards the west side of the palace like always."

"Thank you…" I said as I walked off, not looking back.

I walked down the lonely hallway. I passed all the stained glass windows with bits of Equestrian history on them. Some of these events I had forgotten, like the time we defeated Lord Sauron, King Sombra's father. So many centuries had passed. Then, I came across a window that I had never seen before. It was mine, or, rather, my alter ego's. It was a picture of Celestia imprisoning me in the moon. Memories flooded my mind…All the darkness and fear that I brought to Equestria…all the destruction…all the pain and sadness…it was too much for me. I ripped the bouquet of roses off of my neck and wept as I ran to my room. Some guards tried calling to me to see if I was alright; I ran past them. I came to the door, opened it quickly and then shut it behind me. I allowed myself to cry for a moment, then I gathered myself and looked around. Everything was just as I had left it. It was dark, perfect for my eyesight (I see much better at night). All of my books, my writings and journal entries scattered about, my stuffed unicorn, Princess Phoebe, that my mother have given me when I was a filly- everything was where I had left it. Celestia must have hoped that I would return someday. I couldn't have asked for a better sister. I sauntered over to my bed where Princess Phoebe was lying. Her coat was a darker blue than mine was, and her main and tail sparkled like the stars. I wanted so much to be like her when I was little. I grabbed her, curled up in my bed and drew the covers tightly over me with my magic. I just wanted to forget the world for a while…


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up on my own later that evening. The sun was partially set. Celestia used to do that to remind me to lower the moon. Wow, lowering the moon…I hadn't done that in a thousand years…I didn't even know if I remembered how to lower the moon after all those years.

I got up out of my bed and walked to the large, glass window in front of me. I saw Canterlot in the evening sun. It was beautiful; I had forgotten how beautiful. It was even more beautiful at night in my opinion. At night…that's how it all started. I saw beauty in the night, beauty that my sister never understood. I wanted others to see the beauty that I did, but they were all too busy basking in her precious light-

_Just then, Luna heard dark, sinister whispers in her head. "Yes, Luna. The night is beautiful. Let the rest of Equestria see its beauty…"_

"No!" I screamed when I recognized the whispers. Those were the same whispers I heard for weeks before I became Nightmare Moon. They were still with me…why? Could I not get rid of them? I wept when I realized that they may never go away, that my worst nightmare was still inside of me. I didn't know if I could bear becoming that monster, not again.

After a few moments, I resolved that although those voices may still live within me, waiting to take over again, I wouldn't let them. I wouldn't become that horrible creature again. I was a princess, scarred past or not, and I would live the rest of my life as such, even if I wouldn't be accepted as one ever again. Well, my return seemed to be welcomed warmly by the ponies in Ponyville, but it was probably only because Celestia was there. They couldn't have been happy about my return. They didn't even know who I really was.

"Princess Luna? Are you alright?" A guard had quietly entered my room while I was deep in thought.

"What? O…yes…I- I'm fine," I responded, hiding my true emotions. "What is it?"

"Princess Celestia sent me here to get you. She wants you to meet her on the balcony."

"Hmph…and I suppose you're here to escort me there?" I said, feeling that Celestia didn't fully trust me again.

"Well, yes, she did, Princess, but only because you've been gone for so many years. She thought you may not have remembered the way."

"Oh…" I guess Tia really did trust me again. Well that was foolish of me to make that assumption…and embarrassing. "I guess that's alright then."

"Are you ready to go, Princess?"

"Yes. I'm ready." He extended one of his front legs, pointing to the door. I began walking, and he walked by my side. It felt weird, having a royal escort again. The guard seemed a bit uneasy as we walked down the long corridor. Could he be afraid of me?

He interrupted my thoughts once again, "Are you sure you're alright, Princess Luna? You seem troubled by something."

This guard could read me too well. Still, I didn't want to tell him what was bothering me. "It's nothing that concerns you…"

The guard nodded. "Understood, Princess." It bothered me that he kept addressing me as "Princess." I mean, I was, but it still irritated me. I guess I still hadn't forgiven myself. How could I?

I thought about my response my escort. I realized it sounded a bit harsh. Not wanting to give him any further reason for suspicion, I said softly, "I apologize if my response was harsh earlier. I didn't mean for it to be."

"It's alright, Princess," he said, sounding somewhat friendly.

"If I may ask, how can you address me as 'Princess' so easily?"

"Well, that is your title, Princess Luna. Although, I will admit that it is different addressing another princess in this castle."

"I bet it is…" I hung my head as I walked.

Unknown to me at the time, the guard had seen my reaction. He said, "If I may, Princess, I wouldn't hang your head if I were you. It's undignified and unbecoming for you."

Even when I was here centuries ago, no guard had ever been so bold as to address me in such a manner. I was shocked and even a bit offended. "I beg your pardon?" I asked, raising my head.

"My apologies, Princess, but everyone seems to be rejoicing over your return, everyone but you."

He was right; I wasn't rejoicing. "If you had done what I did a thousand years ago, you wouldn't be rejoicing over your return, either."

"Hmm…I suppose not. But I know my friends and family would be overjoyed to see me back, regardless of what I had done, because they love me. And, if I may be so bold again, I'd say that the whole kingdom would rejoice if I were once in a place of royalty. I knew that the kingdom would rejoice because the ruler, or rulers, was rejoicing. And Princess Celestia is rejoicing over your return, Princess."

He made so much sense it was almost sickening. I hated when others were right. I still just couldn't see how anyone could be rejoicing over my return, not after everything I had done. Still, I was curious how the guard personally felt about this whole situation. "Does this mean that your happy as well, fair knight?"

He smiled a bit, "I am, Princess."

"Why?"

"It's just exciting to me, to see the Lost Princess return."

I scoffed, "Haven't heard that title for me before."

"Well, it's not exactly a common nickname. It's actually a name I coined myself."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. I knew that you were lost inside of that creature, and I hoped that one day you would return. Now, you have."

I couldn't believe it. Somepony, aside from my sister, had actually hoped for my return. I was baffled. "I- I don't know what to say. I never thought anypony besides my sister would be happy about my return."

"It seems as though you stand corrected then, Princess." This guard was a bit too bold for his own good. However, he seemed good natured. A gray Pegasus with shimmering blue eyes and a black mane and tail, he looked handsome to me. His voice was soothing as well.

When we reached the double doors leading to the balcony at the end of the hallway, he put a hoof up and opened the door to the right. Although I was still stunned by what he had said, I was grateful the Celestia had sent him to be my escort. Then, it dawned on me that I didn't even know his name. I felt embarrassed that I hadn't asked that earlier. Not wishing to publicly appear anymore undignified than I had been, I simply said, "Thank you, sir-"

"Lucan, Captain Lucan," he bowed as he gently corrected me.

"Thank you, Captain Lucan." I turned and walked through the door, which he closed behind me. I hoped that I would see him again in the near future, at least one more time.

I walked to the edge of the balcony where Celestia was waiting. I glanced at her; her expression seemed glad but troubled at the same time. No doubt she was concerned about me.

"Hello, little sister," she said softly.

"Hello," I replied.

"I was just about to lower the sun."

"Lower it?"

"Yes, lower it. I wanted you to raise the moon tonight."

I was beginning to wonder if Tia had started drinking the wine from the banquets we had centuries ago; she never lowered the sun, let alone wanted me to raise the moon. She perceived by thoughts by the confused expression on my face. She laughed gently. "Yes, Luna, I'm serious. Besides, you always wanted to raise the moon for other ponies to see."

"Yes…I did…" I said, sadly, remembering what that desire had done to me. "That was a long time ago…"

"You must want to still, Luna. You've always wanted other ponies to see how beautiful the night is-"

"Celestia, please…" the memories were too much for me at that moment. "I don't need any reminders…" I was beginning to tear up.

She put her wing around me; she was good at doing that whenever I was feeling down, even after all these years. It was just as comforting then as it had been all those years before. "Luna," she said softly, "I know that this must be hard for you, but you're not that creature anymore. You're back to your old self again. I just hate to see you so broken." She pulled me by her side. Tears were streaming down my face at that point. She bent her head down to hug me. "It's ok, Luna," she said as she let me cry against her. I could tell that she was fighting back tears herself.

A brief moment passed before she raised her head again; she kept her wing around me. "Are you up to raising the moon tonight?"

I had wanted to, but was now afraid to. I didn't want that monster coming back. Nevertheless, I was a Princess again, and lowering- and now raising apparently- was my royal duty. I nodded.

Tia took her wing off me and stepped back a bit. I rose to my hooves. I just hoped I could remember the spell to raise the moon. She used her magic to lower the sun, then looked at me, smiling a little. I took a deep breath, then cast my spell. It still felt natural to me. I raised the moon to its proper position in the sky; it was full tonight, and it was also very beautiful. I was feeling a bit weird, though. I had been trapped in the moon for so long, I had almost forgotten how beautiful it was to look at.

"Beautiful," Tia said walking up beside me again.

"Yes, it is," I agreed, "although they'll never notice." I was referring to the ponies in Canterlot.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, Luna," Celestia said confidently. "Look down there."

I did, and I saw the citizens of Canterlot emerge into the moonlight with awestruck eyes.

"Did you see that?" said one.

"It had a ring of blue magic around it. I had never seen that before," said another.

"It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Who could have done this?" said a third.

I couldn't believe it. Ponies were actually marveling in the beauty of the night instead of rushing to get inside.

"See? You're not the only one who sees beauty in the night, Luna," Tia said, sounding more of a sister than a princess at that moment.

"I suppose you're right, Tia," I said.

"Would you also mind taking the night shift again?"

"Sure!" I said, more eager than I had realized.

Celestia only giggled. "Now that's the Luna I remember." She bent her head down again to hug me; I reluctantly returned the favor, still having trouble believing that she accepted me back so quickly.

She raised her head again. "Will you be alright by yourself tonight?"

I nodded, "Yes. I'll be alright."

"Alright. There will be guards posted at the doors, but they're only there for a formality. Come and get me if you need anything."

Her big sister instinct hadn't left her; she was still protective after all those years. "I will, Sis." I was surprised at how fast I seemed to be adjusting.

Tia smiled. "Alright. Goodnight then, Luna. It really is good to have you back." She said as she walked away.

I looked back at the moon, then at the other ponies who were still staring in awe of its beauty. I smiled, "It's good to be back, Tia."


End file.
